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June 21, 2013 / jenwithboys

Freak.

While I’ve always known that I’m a freak for being so young, having a thousand children and no husband, I only recently discovered that since I had those children in my late teenage and early twenties years, that now, at 34, I am approaching a mid-life crisis. Balk if you will, the timeline is accurate. I’ve been a mom for 15 years. Sixteen if you count pregnancy. I’ve married, divorced, bought (2) homes, lost one to foreclosure, driven a minivan (twice) and have joined and quit Weight Watchers several times. I will extol the glory of prunes, pretend the more coarse hairs are just “bleached out” rather than gray, am totally on a first name basis with my handsome gynocologist and quite frankly, I enjoy the pair of jeans that I have that button above the belly button. I enjoy Ladies Home Journal, cooking with my crockpot and getting to bed at a decent hour. I think those things more than qualify me as regular 50 year old woman.
Having said all that, I think you will understand if you see me this weekend, wearing my USF Bulls T-shirt, hair in a high ponytail, driving fast, blaring Lil Wayne. In my minivan.

I mean, it’s perfectly natural to want to reclaim your youth. Especially if you’ve never actually had one. Right?

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